by Randall Allen Dunn

The other night at dinner, Nicki wondered if I’m spending more time on writing than I need to, because I’m not spending much time with her and the kids.

Abby immediately piped in. “You’re always working, and you never have time to play with me,” she said. She put up a hand, trying to look understanding, though it felt more like she was patting me on the head. “Now I knooow that you have to do lots of work, and I knooow writing is veeery important … To you.”

It was funny and sad at the same time. Sad because I know it’s true. Over the last two months, Abby has asked me to play with her several times, and I usually tell her I have work to do.

Which is also true. With creating lessons for teaching 6 writing classes a month, my life is busier than it’s ever been. Once I complete all of my reading and researching, I still need to learn how to format e-books for publishing, update the Character Entertainment website, and finally get back to writing new stories again.

But I don’t want to lose the short time I have with my kids. I don’t want to discover one day that twenty years of their lives have flown by, and the only thing I built during my time with them was my own career.

In the film, “Mary Poppins”, Mr. Banks (David Tomlinson) seeks a nanny to look after his children, whose antics have chased away every previous nanny his wife hired. Taking matters into his own hands, he determines to find a nanny that can keep Jane (Karen Dotrice) and Michael (Matthew Garber) in line. The children apologize for their misbehavior, and offer their own suggestions for an advertisement. They want a nanny who is kind and pretty, and ready to sing songs and play games with them. In other words, someone happy and fun!

But the last thing Mr. Banks wants is a “fun” nanny. He tears up their ludicrous “advertisement” and tosses it in his fireplace. But after he turns away, the torn pieces float up the chimney.

A nanny soon shows up on his doorstep, descending gracefully from the clouds as she holds onto an umbrella. A strong wind has just blown away every other applicant, leaving the umbrella-wielding Mary Poppins (Julie Andrews) as the only possible choice. She presents Mr. Banks with the children’s ad, its pieces now fully restored, and reads from it to provide her qualifications. She takes the job and entertains the children with songs, games and outings to the park, including a magical trip into a chalkboard drawing to visit a beautiful countryside populated with animated carousel horses and dinner-serving penguins. The children have more fun with Mary Poppins and her friend, Bert (Dick Van Dyke), than they’ve ever had with anyone!

But they still miss their father.

When Mr. Banks tries to teach the children responsibility by urging Michael to deposit his money into a savings account, the father’s greedy boss (also Dick Van Dyke) frightens the children so much that they run off. Their antics create a panic at the bank that leads to the shaming and firing of Mr. Banks.

At which point, he realizes that his career wasn’t all that important after all. What good was it to chase after his career and to maintain a proper image if it cost him his own children?

For the first time since his childhood, Mr. Banks learns to laugh and play again, and takes his children out to fly kites together. And as Mrs. Banks (Glynis Johns) decides to limit her time spent on political activities, they all decide that they don’t really need a nanny anymore.

Because they have each other.

When our lives get busy, it’s easy to let our busy-ness crowd out time with our kids. A mountain of tasks piles on top of another mountain, until it’s all we can see.

But if I focus only on the mountain, I’ll miss the times I have with my kids for the few short years they’re living at home – times I can never get back once they’re gone.

When I called Nicki from work yesterday, I asked to talk to Abby, who was playing a computer game. On the phone, she gave short answers to all my questions about her day. She finally explained, “I’m having trouble because I’m talking on the phone and I’m playing a game. It’s kind of hard.”

I understood, and we cut our call short. I was disappointed, having really wanted to just talk for a couple of minutes.

And I realized she was doing the same thing I had been doing. As that endless “Cat’s in the Cradle” song started droning in my mind, I considered what a small thing this was. I didn’t expect her to stop her game so we could talk. But as she grows older, video games will be replaced with sports and parties and other activities, and she won’t have any time to spend with me, the same way I didn’t have time to spend with her. Not because she didn’t want to talk to me.

She would simply be busy.

This morning, I hugged Abby and we laughed and played together. Then I tried to apologize for not spending more time with her lately, to tell her it was wrong and I was sorry. But she was too busy goofing around, hanging sideways from my arms and making silly faces. She didn’t need any apology or explanation. She just needed me to be there.

And I’ve decided I will be.

Find more reviews of “Mary Poppins” at amazon.com!

by Randall Allen Dunn

Have you ever considered that the prettiest girl on the block might not be the most beautiful? We all know that “beauty is only skin deep”, but in our image-obsessed society, very few people actually live by that knowledge. Most people never allow themselves to see beneath the surface.

In the film, “Get Smart”, CIA Analyst Maxwell Smart (Steve Carell) dreams of becoming an Agent. When a CIA crisis provides him the opportunity for promotion, he is overjoyed … and embarrasses himself by accidentally squealing for joy in front of his co-workers.

Unfortunately, his new partner, Agent 99 (Anne Hathaway), is not thrilled about being saddled with a novice agent. And Max’s ongoing blunders make her trust him less and less. However, Max proves himself to her over time, demonstrating skills of negotiation and insight that she never dreamed an agent could possess.

One of his impressive stunts always reminds me of an experience I had myself. At a party, Max draws everyone’s attention by asking a woman to dance. The gorgeous woman standing closest to him responds with a snooty air, “I don’t think so.”

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Max says, looking instead at a very heavyset woman sitting on a bench behind her. She is shocked that Max has picked her over the other three hotties, and accepts his invitation. They take the floor, out-dancing the party’s host as he dances with Agent 99.

I expect Max knew that this woman might be someone who was often overlooked by our image-obsessed culture. Where others only looked at the surface and found the overweight woman unattractive, Max saw a human being, who might be fun to dance with. And he was right.

He also knew what it felt like to be passed over, having been very overweight himself for many years. Not to mention being passed over for promotion, and looked down on for his inexperience as an agent.

I spent a lot of my school years as a nerd, who was dismissed by most of my peers. I wasn’t athletic, good-looking, charming, or fashionable. The friends I made were typically drawn to the person inside – someone who was caring, loyal and accepting of others.

After I graduated high school, I was at a party where I asked out an attractive girl if she wanted to dance. She declined, and I moved on. I asked out another stranger, who was less attractive on the surface. She accepted, and we had a great time together.

Years later, a wise man at my church advised me to start dating more, because it was a great way to get to know people and see whether a relationship might develop. I decided to ask out women who were less than my ideal, physically, because I knew that physical attraction grows when you are attracted to a person’s inner self. It seemed silly to limit myself to only dating the most beautiful women I could find, when I was searching for someone who was beautiful on the inside.

When we look beneath the surface, we find something much deeper and more rewarding than a beautiful exterior. Don’t overlook the beauty waiting to be discovered within someone.

Find more reviews of “Get Smart” at amazon.com!

by Randall Allen Dunn

Nicki and I just started watching the remastered editions of the original “Star Trek” series. (Which, by the way, is the only way to watch them anymore, where the special effects are updated and the planets look like planets, so that it’s no longer embarrassing to watch the original shows without having to keep explaining that those were the best special effects they could do on television in the 1960’s.)

Still, I felt a little embarrassed about watching the episode, “Mudd’s Women”, with my wife, about three sexy women who are brought aboard the starship and give all the male crew members fits. Seeing the episode title, Nicki said, “‘Mudd’s Women’? Like, are they wrestling or something?”

I instantly felt more comfortable, realizing how much worse the episode could have been. “I never even considered that,” I said. “I don’t know if anyone ever has.”

In the episode, Captain James Kirk (William Shatner) rescues a reckless space traveler, Harry Mudd, from crashing his own fleeing spaceship. Along with Mudd, they transport three deliriously beautiful women, whom Mudd describes as his “cargo”. He’s in the business of finding wives for men isolated on distant colonies – the future’s version of “mail-order brides” for the galactic frontier. In that fashion, the women are not slaves, but willing volunteers who are in an equally bad position, having no men left on their own planets.

What Mudd isn’t telling anyone is that these gorgeous women are gorgeous because of the illegal Venus drug, which transforms their ordinary features into those of goddesses. When they find prospective husbands among some dilithium crystal miners, the men are eager to seal the marriage deal. But when one of them discovers that his wife, Evie, is plain-looking without the drug, he feels cheated.

Kirk allows Evie to take the Venus drug again, transforming herself into a desirable woman once more. She only wants to show her new husband how meaningless it is to pursue a beautiful, vapid woman instead of a wife – someone who can be a friend and partner to him. Despite his rude reception of her, she’s already cooked him a good meal and advised him how to sand-blast his pans clean on his wasteland planet. She’s shown him how she can help him – as a wife. Not as a fantasy lover.

But Kirk reveals that the Venus drug Evie took was just colored gelatin. Evie became beautiful because she chose to see herself that way, instead of seeing herself as ordinary and plain-looking.

A marriage involves both.

My wife and I recently were blessed by our church with an overnight stay at a hotel, along with a gift card for a restaurant dinner. It was their way of saying thank you to Nicki, for all her work in heading up our children’s ministry this past year. Their only stipulation was that we not bring our kids, because they wanted us to have time alone to relax.

We weren’t sure what to do with that. I know many couples would love to get away from their kids, but we’ve never been that way. In fact, we haven’t had an overnight stay without kids anywhere since Abby was born, over five years ago. And anyone with kids knows that it takes extra time and money to hire a sitter and make plans for all of that alone time.

But once we had arranged for a sitter to stay the night and headed for our hotel, we soon discovered how much we needed the time away. It’s not as though our marriage was suffering. In fact, we have at least as much fun as most couples, and we rarely have arguments. When we do, they usually get resolved within a matter of minutes.

But after spending time by ourselves, I realized that we normally operate in “work mode”, figuring out how to manage chores of laundry, dishes, and kids, along with other activities of writing and church ministry. We have a great time together doing it, but it always involves work, even when we’re “relaxing” with the kids. It was rare to have an evening out, with no responsibilities. We didn’t know how much we needed that until we had it.

In a marriage, people need to know how to work together. To support one another as partners, co-workers, and best friends.

They also need to know how to let their hair down. To not view their marriage as a business relationship or a drudgery, but as the best relationship that one person can have with another. Something to be treasured and celebrated, in fun getaways, quiet moments, and intimate care for the one they love.

Nicki was surprised to find that she liked the “Mudd’s Women” episode. I’m sure she was relieved that it had nothing to do with mud wrestling.

I’m relieved to know that my marriage is real. Not something I have to endure, in order to help get things done. Nor is it merely a fantasy relationship, that looks sexy and exciting on the surface but lacks any real trust or commitment. Our marriage is fun and adventurous, as well as being practical and supportive. In short, we’re in love.

And we don’t need a Venus drug to stay that way.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Find more reviews of “Star Trek Season 1” at amazon.com!

by Randall Allen Dunn

As the New Year begins, everyone is eager to make plans. To make this the year that they finally achieve their long-held goals.

Yet for most of us, the end of this year will be much like the end of last year: wishing we had accomplished more and wondering where the time went.

If we took an inventory, we would likely find that we spent more of our time watching television or chatting online than we would have liked. We would discover that we never reached our goals for the year because we simply never spent enough time planning and working them out.

In the book, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Harry Potter is thrilled to spend his first Christmas away from home. Having never known his parents – both of them wizards slain by Harry’s new enemy, Voldemort – Harry was raised by his cruel Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia Dursley, forced to live in a cupboard (closet) under the stairs and suffer the bullying of his spoiled cousin, Dudley. So Harry happily agreed to stay at Hogwart’s School of Witchcraft and Wizardry rather than return to their house for the Christmas holidays.

Having been so poorly neglected by the Dursleys, Harry is amazed to actually receive Christmas presents from his new friends at Hogwart’s. His best friend, Ron Weasley, replies, “What did you expect, turnips?”

One of Harry’s presents, an invisibility cloak, allows him to do some snooping in the restricted sections of the school library, to learn more about the dangerous treasure being kept on school grounds, so that he and his friends can protect it.

While searching, he accidentally discovers something else: a large mirror with a message written on its frame. When Harry looks into the mirror, he finds something he never expected to see in his wildest dreams.

It was a magnificent mirror, as high as the ceiling, with an ornate gold frame, standing on two clawed feet. There was an inscription carved around the top: erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi.

His panic fading now that there was no sound of Filch and Snape, Harry moved nearer to the mirror, wanting to look at himself but see no reflection again. He stepped in front of it.

He had to clap his hands to his mouth to stop himself from screaming. He whirled around. His heart was pounding far more furiously than when the book had screamed – for he had seen not only himself in the mirror, but a whole crowd of people standing right behind him.

But the room was empty. Breathing very fast, he turned slowly back to the mirror.

There he was, reflected in it, white and scared-looking, and there, reflected behind him, were at least ten others. Harry looked over his shoulder – but still, no one was there. Or were they all invisible, too? Was he in fact in a room full of invisible people and the mirror’s trick was that it reflected them, invisible or not?

He looked in the mirror again. A woman standing right behind his reflection was smiling at him and waving. He reached out a hand and felt the air behind him. If she was really there, he’d touch her, their reflections were so close together, but he felt only air – she and the others existed only in the mirror.

She was a very pretty woman. She had dark red hair and her eyes – her eyes are just like mine, Harry thought, edging a little closer to the glass. Bright green – exactly the same shape, but then he noticed that she was crying; smiling, but crying at the same time. The tall, thin, black-haired man standing next to her put his arm around her. He wore glasses, and his hair was very untidy. It stuck up at the back, just as Harry’s did.

Harry was so close to the mirror now that his nose was nearly touching that of his reflection.

“Mom?” he whispered. “Dad?”

They just looked at him, smiling. And slowly, Harry looked into the faces of the other people in the mirror, and saw other pairs of green eyes like his, other noses like his, even a little old man who looked as though he had Harry’s knobbly knees – Harry was looking at his family, for the first time in his life.

He hurries to show Ron that he has found a mirror that shows him his long-lost parents. But when Ron looks into it, he sees something entirely different. He sees himself, achieving school status as head boy and athletic fame as a star Quidditch player, getting the attention and respect he has always longed for.

Harry is confused. Ron thinks the mirror might show the future, but Harry knows this can’t be true, since his parents died long ago.

Headmaster Albus Dumbledore clears things up for Harry, as he finds him returning once again to the mirror’s image of his long-lost parents.

“So,” said Dumbledore, slipping off the desk to sit on the floor with Harry, “you, like hundreds before you, have discovered the delights of the Mirror of Esired.”

“I didn’t know it was called that, sir.”

“But I expect you’ve realized by now what it does?”

“It – well – it shows me my family –.”

“And it showed your friend Ron himself as head boy.”

“How did you know –?”

“I don’t need a cloak to become invisible,” said Dumbledore gently. “Now, can you think what the Mirror of Esired shows us all?”

Harry shook his head.

“Let me explain. The happiest man on earth would be able to use the Mirror of Esired like a normal mirror, that is, he would look into it and see himself exactly as he is. Does that help?”

Harry thought. Then he said slowly, “It shows us what we want … whatever we want …”

“Yes and no,” said Dumbledore quietly. “It shows us nothing more or less than the deepest, most desperate desire of our hearts. You, who have never known your family, see them standing around you. Ronald Weasley, who has always been overshadowed by his brothers, sees himself standing alone, the best of all of them. However, this mirror will give us neither knowledge or truth. Men have wasted away before it, entranced by what they have seen , or been driven mad, not knowing if what it shows is real or even possible.

“The Mirror will be moved to a new home tomorrow, Harry, and I ask you not to go looking for it again. If you ever do run across it, you will now be prepared. It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live, remember that.”

If Harry had examined the mirror itself more closely, he might have figured out for himself what it reveals, by reading its inscriptions backwards. But the lure of a dream can easily paralyze us into adopting a dreamlike state, wishing and hoping for something to happen – instead of acting to make it so. And in that stupor, we often fail to notice details of the reality around us. Such as the fact that we’re not taking the necessary actions to get things done.

It’s good to have a dream. But if we never do more with it than dream it, we might as well sit and dream in front of a mirror like Harry’s.

Or in front of a TV like ours.

This year, make a plan to achieve your dreams and write it down. You might not achieve everything you hope to, but you’ll come a lot closer to it by the time next December rolls around.

Happy New Year!

Find more reviews of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone at amazon.com!

As of January 2012, Blogs will continue to post at least once a month, but will no longer be posted on a weekly basis, and there will no longer be a Monthly Highlights recap of the Blogs and Monthly Feature.

However, you can sign up to receive news and information every few months about Randall Allen Dunn’s works, Creative Writing Classes, and the Character Entertainment website, by subscribing to the Randall Allen Dunn Character Entertainment Newsletter. Simply send an email with “SUBSCRIBE” in the header to: randall@characterent.com

I hope you all have a fantastic new year in 2012!

- RAD

by Randall Allen Dunn

Take it all down.

Christmas is over.

Do not despair

But rather, be glad.

We had a good year.

Now let’s have another,

Remembering all the good times that we had.

It’s easy to get discouraged when the holidays are over. The presents have all been opened and the beautiful ribbons and bows have become a pile of clutter on the floor. Some people plan for Christmas and look forward to it all year, then get depressed when the parties are all over. They put their whole heart – and most of their bank account – into the holidays. And once the holidays are over, so is their joy.

That’s understandable. Everyone is a little disappointed after a wonderful party finally ends. But we don’t have to wait for next Christmas or the next big event to enjoy all that life has to offer.

The Relient K song, “Boxing Day”, talks about this kind of sadness creeping in. Making us feel that, without Christmas, life gets boring again. Personally, I love Christmas. It’s my favorite holiday and my favorite time of year, and I always miss it when it’s gone. But life doesn’t end – or become sad – when the date changes on the calendar.

Oh, no more lights glistening.

No more carols to sing.

But Christmas, it makes way for spring.

Of course, people won’t be as excited or friendly as they were at Christmastime, and the twinkling lights and decorations will gradually disappear from rooftops and store displays. The anticipation for Christmas presents and family get-togethers will vanish, to be substituted with anticipation for New Year’s Eve parties, resolutions, and plans for the coming year.

Like New Year’s Day, Christmas should be a renewal. A time when we discover the capacity we have in us for kindness, compassion, charity and faith. A time when we re-discover the wonder of childhood and the joy of fresh hope.

Why should that evaporate when the calendar changes?

It’s interesting that Boxing Day originated as an act of service. It was designated as a special celebration for servants, who had to spend the entire Christmas day working – just like store employees stuck working on the holiday. Boxing Day allowed the servants to have their own Christmas all to themselves. The “Christmas spirit” led people to think about the welfare of those serving them throughout the holidays, and create a special time for them, beyond December 25^th.

The hearts of men

Are bitter and weathered,

As cold as the snow

That falls from above.

But just for one day,

We all came together.

We showed the whole world that we know how to love.

Why not hold on to what we learned and experienced at Christmas, to carry it with us for the rest of the year? And for the rest of our lives?

If we allow Christmas to be more than just a party or a date on the calendar, then discouragement won’t find room to settle in our hearts. And we’ll find that we not only look forward to next Christmas with greater joy, but we also look forward to everything else in the coming year.

Don’t just celebrate Christmas; celebrate life.

Find more reviews of “Let It Snow, Baby, Let It Reindeer” at amazon.com!

by Randall Allen Dunn

I have to admit: I just don’t feel as “Christmas-y” this year as I have in the past. I think it’s because I’ve been so far behind in my schedule of Christmas activities. Two weeks before Christmas, we still didn’t have our tree up, we still had not wrapped any presents, and I was still trying to figure out how to set up our porch lights correctly. We had hardly listened to any Christmas music, only watched two Christmas movies, and the only Christmas party I attended was the one at my office. We’ve just been too busy, and I think everyone’s been a little too broke to make elaborate plans for parties or programs or anything else.

Meanwhile, my minor attempts to enjoy Christmas with the kids were kind of a bust. Abby’s thrilled about Christmas, of course. She loves singing Christmas carols any time of the year. But we had to re-schedule three plans for seeing Christmas lights, and the only Christmas movies she wanted to watch were “Elf” and “Christmas with the Kranks” – each one for the third time this year. She finally consented to change up the pace by watching a Christmas cartoon. However, instead of “Frosty the Snowman” or “Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town”, or any of the other movies I anticipated sharing with her again this year, she chose “Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas” – which she watched for about sixty days straight last year. But it’s something, anyway. Only fifty-nine more viewings to go.

Meanwhile, Nicki and I have been too busy to relax much with a Christmas movie or anything else. She’s been watching kids for child care during the day and making fudge to sell at night, while I’m creating and preparing lessons for the three writing classes I’m teaching and writing blogs like this one to let everyone know how extremely busy we are. We know we’ll get it all done by Christmas day, but it seems harder to enjoy the journey without our usual traditions. It just doesn’t feel like the Christmas we had hoped for.

I share some of the disappointment of divorced radio psychologist Frasier Crane (Kelsey Grammer), on the “Frasier” TV episode, “Miracle on Third or Fourth Street”. Excited to spend Christmas with his young son, he’s devastated to learn that plans have changed and his son won’t be able to visit. He ends up taking out his frustrations on his father and the rest of his family, and walks out on their Christmas plans. He’s no longer in a festive “Christmas” mood.

He regrets his outburst later, realizing he’s just depressed over missing his son. Desperate to restore his Christmas spirit, he volunteers to cover a late-night shift on the air, to invite callers to talk about how they maintain their Christmas spirit.

Unfortunately, the callers provide such dismal reports of their own tragedies and misery at Christmas that Frasier ends the show, emotionally drained and despondent. He soon ends up moping at a diner, unshaven in a sweatshirt and jeans, feeling less Christmas-like than ever.

Then, to top off his horrible day, he discovers that his wallet is missing. Seeing how he’s dressed, the waitress doesn’t buy his story about leaving it in his overcoat in his car down the street.

But a homeless man named Tim (John J. Finn) sitting at the counter tells Frasier not to worry, because he’ll help cover it. “It’s okay, buddy. We’ve all been there,” he assures him. He takes his hat around to the other customers, asking them to donate their change to help a man cover his bill. Frasier is deeply embarrassed by the gesture, but the man tells him, “Don’t be embarrassed. Look at it this way. The rest of the year belongs to the rich people, with their fancy houses and their expensive foreign cars. But Christmas – Christmas belongs to guys like us.”

He hands the bowl to the waitress, who also throws in some change to cover Frasier’s meal. And Frasier realizes that his idea of what makes Christmas special and meaningful wasn’t quite right. It’s not the traditions and trappings of Christmas that make it worth celebrating. It’s not the satisfaction of seeing family and friends, seeing children unwrap special gifts, seeing Christmas plays or films or concerts. It’s that people – for one day or even a whole month – are willing to think about others more than they think about themselves.

Christmas isn’t about getting what we want. It’s about giving others what they need. And if even a handful of people – whether they’re rich or poor, ugly or pretty, influential or unknown – can reach into their hearts and souls to show someone else that unconditional love and compassion, Christmas will be sure to come, year after year after year.

I hope your Christmas is just as special.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

Find more reviews of “Frasier Season 1” at amazon.com!

by Randall Allen Dunn

It’d be so nice to look out the window

And see the leaves on the trees begin to show.

The birds would congregate and sing

A song of birth, a song of newer things.

The wind would calm and the sun would shine.

I’d go outside and I’d squint my eyes.

But for now, I will simply just withdraw.

Sit here and wish for this world to thaw.

I’m starting to understand how some people can get so consumed with Christmas “busy-ness” that all of their holiday fun gets swallowed up in work. This is one of the busiest times in my life, and definitely the busiest Christmas I’ve had in years.

I started up a new Advanced Creative Writing Class focusing on Genre Studies – which means I have to actually study each of those genres myself to adequately instruct others on how to write for them, before creating the actual lessons. I’ve also started teaching a condensed version of the Beginner’s Creative Writing Class at a local library – which means I have to take time to condense it – cutting the regular lessons in half – before I can present them.

Meanwhile, Nicki is caring for up to six children at a time – and only two of them live with us! She’s also been leading and coordinating our church’s Sunday school program, scheduling adult teachers and filling in wherever needed, while finding curriculum and developing new plans to improve the overall program. On top of that, she’s been making her famous fudge to sell for the holidays, so we’ve been arranging a party for people to sample fudge, while Nicki keeps baking pans of fudge and filling orders.

We’re tired.

When February rolls around, I’ll roll my eyes.

Turn a cold shoulder to these even colder skies.

And by the fire, my heart, it heaves a sigh

For the green grass waiting on the other side.

Most nights, we’ve gotten to bed sometime after 11pm and gotten up by at least 6:30 when the kids wake up. If we’re lucky, we can wake up before they do and have time to make a pot of coffee first.

It sounds like I’m complaining, but I’m actually having a lot of fun, despite being tired from creating nine advanced lessons, helping Nicki guard six kids, hanging four strings of Christmas lights, teaching three classes, helping Nicki prepare desserts for two December weddings, and shopping for a partridge in a pear tree just to top it all off. I never expected the month of Christmas to be as hectic as this one has become. It’s easy to see how some people find little reason to celebrate Christmas. It can seem like nothing but work, work, work to make some bratty kids happy for a few hours, before cleaning up the mess and returning to our slightly less chaotic routines. Why would anyone be excited about that?

I know I wouldn’t. Which is why I never let the “busy-ness” of Christmas crowd out Christmas itself.

It’s always winter, but never Christmas.

It seems this curse just can’t be lifted.

Yet in the midst of all this ice and snow,

Our hearts stay warm, ‘cause they are filled with hope.

I got to bed past midnight last night. This morning, I woke up around six o’clock and went downstairs while my family slept. I spent time in prayer, thanking God for his friendship and for his peace. I read my Bible, too, but I mainly felt that I needed to take time this morning to just thank God for who he is and what he’s done in my life. What he’s still doing in my life.

Even in a year when I’ve gotten so busy that Christmas almost seems like just another item added to my to-do list, I make time to relax, and experience the peace and joy of this season. Of knowing that I’m loved and appreciated by family and friends. That I have a roof over my head and food in my stomach. That I have a role and purpose in life, to encourage and inspire others to be the best people they can be. And that Someone loved me enough to come to this place where I live, live a life like mine, die to receive the punishment I deserved, and live again to put this peace in my heart. I refuse to let the busy-ness of Christmas rob me of this quiet joy every December.

And everything, it changed overnight.

This dying world, you brought it back to life.

And deep inside, I felt things

Shifting, everything was melting away.

And you gave us the most beautiful of days.

Why let the standard holiday busy-ness turn you into a Christmas cynic, failing to recognize the peace this season brings? Take time amid your hectic schedule for moments of quiet reflection, or you’ll miss the whole Christmas season. The tree, the gifts, the lights, the holiday movies – they’re all meaningless if you have no peace and joy in your heart.

If you’ve got too much on your plate this year, consider cutting back on some of it. In recent years, Nicki and I learned to let go of some things that we once considered essential for Christmas. When one of our beloved traditions or activities started to become a burden, we decided it wasn’t worth stressing over. Why not have one less party, one less project, one less pageant, one less program, one less perfect holiday tradition on your already busy schedule? Removing some of those extra activities won’t kill your Christmas spirit, believe me.

In fact, it might help you get your Christmas back.

Don’t let anything – even if it looks like Christmas – rob you of the real gift this season brings us.

Find more reviews of “Let It Snow, Baby, Let It Reindeer” at amazon.com!

by Randall Allen Dunn

It’s easy to take people for granted. To decide that we do a lot more for our friends and family than they ever do for us. After all, without us, where would they be?

When we start thinking this way, we should take time to consider where we might be without them.

Shawn Spencer (James Roday), on “psych”, might be television’s most irresponsible detective. He’s also one of the most gifted. His skills of observation, deduction and instinct are so formidable that the police initially thought he had inside knowledge of crimes. The only way Shawn could avoid jail time was by pretending to be a psychic, which results in landing him a consulting job with the department.

His act would never work without the help of his partner, Burton “Gus” Guster (Dulé Hill), whose vast knowledge of medicine, technology and other specialized fields helps fill in the significant gaps in Shawn’s own knowledge. Shawn also gets information and direction from his father, Henry (Corbin Bernsen), a former police officer who now oversees Shawn’s cases. He also has the moral support of Chief Vick (Kirsten Nelson) and his girlfriend, Juliet (Maggie Lawson), who believe in his psychic abilities, although Shawn’s rival, Head Detective Carlton Lassiter (Timothy Omundson), would rather do without Shawn’s intrusive help.

After Shawn and Gus interrupt a well-planned police sting, no one is on Shawn’s side anymore. They’ve finally had enough of his antics and his ego. Shawn feels they’re overreacting, failing to appreciate all he’s done for them, and how much they need his skills.

Shawn retires to his office and falls asleep, dreaming that Tony Cox from “Bad Santa” has appeared to show him the error of his ways. Tony plans to show Shawn what life would be like for his friends if he had never returned to Santa Barbara.

Shawn first sees his father as a lonely slob shut in his home, eating cereal from the box as he sits on his couch in his underwear. Tony insists that Shawn is imagining this, because his father wouldn’t really be that bad off without Shawn around.

Enjoying the fact that he can control some aspects of his dream, Shawn asks to view Gus’ life as a 1980’s sitcom. He sits in a studio audience watching “Willin’ with Da Gusters”, a lame show that makes Gus look foolish, while showing him weighed down by an abusive wife and stepson. “You would do that to your boy?” Tony asks.

Shawn starts to realize that this is the way he normally treats Gus, making a cheap joke of his best friend instead of appreciating his invaluable partnership.

He sees Chief Vick and Lassiter at the police station, ordering the officers around like Gestapo. He can’t help laughing at how ridiculous Lassiter looks. “Well, at least they respect him,” Shawn decides, recognizing that he should do the same.

He then sees Juliet as a T.J. Hooker-style cop in Miami, throwing herself into dangerous situations with no one to back her up when she needs real help.

Shawn realizes that his friends need more than his pretend-psychic insights. They need his respect and support.

He also realizes that he needs all of them, just as much as they need him … if not more.

When he wakes up, he’s figured out the missing pieces of the crime that had puzzled him. But to solve it, he’ll need help. From everyone. Everyone that he routinely mistreated.

He seeks out Gus and the others, making his apologies for his poor treatment of them. He asks each one for a second chance and for their help. His sincere turnaround even wins over Lassiter, who confesses, “Look, this lack of animosity is kind of freaking me out right now.”

With his friends’ help, Shawn is able to expose a slumlord’s corruption and stop a bomb from blowing up a tenement building. Knowing that he could never have done any of it without them.

If you’ve taken some of your loved ones for granted, use this holiday time to make things right with them. Show them how much you truly appreciate them being in your life, recognizing how much you need each of them.

It’s easy to find fault with others, and easiest to find fault with the ones that are closest to us. But consider how easy it is for them to also find fault with you. It might help you better appreciate your friends and family for sticking with you all these years.

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by Randall Allen Dunn

I had always assumed that most people wanted to celebrate Christmas. Sure, there were people who hated the holidays, seeing them as nothing more than a burden, finding no joy in anything that happened throughout the season. But those were typically bitter people, full of cynicism and spite, who never expected anything good to come of any occasion.

So I was stunned to hear many people talking about Christmas with apathy or even antagonism. It seemed like a lot of people would be happy for the holidays to simply be over, so that they wouldn’t have so much work and pressure, with all the holiday trappings that interfere with their normal lives.

Frankly, I don’t get that.

I don’t understand how a celebration of hope, joy and love can become a burden to people. Whether or not you believe in God, why would anyone hate the thought of having a party to celebrate life?

Maybe some people haven’t found much in life that’s worth celebrating yet. And even at Christmastime – with the best opportunity for finding such things – they’ve given up the search.

One such person would probably be Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum), the young billionaire industrialist on the TV series, “Smallville”. Viewers know that Lex will one day become Superman’s greatest nemesis, but he wasn’t born evil, despite the emotional and mental abuse he received from his father. In one episode, “Lexmas”, Lex has a big choice to make at Christmastime, as he prepares to run for a senate seat. An associate assures Lex he can create a rumor that will remove his opponent, Jonathan Kent, from the race. But Lex is uncertain whether he’s willing to destroy the father of his best friend, Clark.

As he decides what to do, he is shot by two muggers, and falls into a dream-state while doctors work to revive him. In his dream world, he is married to Lana Lang (Kristen Kreuk), living a middle-class life with a young son, a minivan with a complicated car seat, and a new baby daughter on the way. From conversations with Lana and others, Lex gradually learns that it has been seven years since the shooting, and that he lost his inheritance after forfeiting the senate race.

More important, he finds that he is respected and admired by everyone around him. Not only his wife, Lana, but also Clark (Tom Welling), Chloe (Allison Mack), and other friends and associates who had always considered him somewhat suspect. For the first time in his life, Lex is completely trusted by those around him. Even Senator Jonathan Kent (John Schneider), who had never trusted Lex, tells him, “I never thought I would say this, Lex, but I couldn’t be prouder of you if you were my own son.” He makes this statement as he reveals privately to Lex that he has been chosen to receive the award for Humanitarian of the Year.

Lex had bought a big Christmas tree that day, explaining to Lana that his father had forbidden the celebration of Christmas in their home after Lex’s mother died. For him, a big tree represented all the Christmases he had missed when he was growing up.

Later, after everyone toasts his achievement at the Kents’ Christmas party, Lex decides that this has been the happiest day of his life. The spirit of his mother appears, telling him that this isn’t merely a dream, but it’s something he can have, if he makes the right choices.

When Lana has complications in childbirth and is near death, Lex has no choice but to seek out his father, Lionel (Jonathan Glover), to fly her to a specialist. But Lionel insists that Lex chose to live a middle-class life, without the money and power he should have pursued, and must now pay the consequence of his choice.

When Lex confronts the spirit of his mother, asking if this is the life he should choose, in which all of his loved ones die, she assures him that this is, in fact, life.

And it is. Like Lex, we can let fear drive us to believe that we need to control the circumstances of life, to force life to meet us on our terms. In such a life, there would be no poverty, no deaths, no arguments, and no disappointments. No pain of any kind.

But life without pain isn’t actually life. That sort of life is nothing more than a dream, from someone who isn’t actually experiencing the struggle of life, and the joy that comes with it. We can’t make our family love us, or keep our friends from leaving us. We can’t insure ourselves against the threat of job loss, demolished homes, or crippling injuries. We can’t make life favor us. We can only choose to live life, with whatever it throws at us, and whatever it gives us to sustain ourselves, day by day.

Surviving the injury, Lex wakes up in the present time, and makes his choice: to live happily ever after. But in order to live that way, he decides that he will need all the money and power he can acquire. So he tells his business associate to go ahead and discredit Jonathan Kent to knock him out of the senate race, as the spirit of Lex’s mother looks on with sadness.

Like everyone else, Lex decides what to do with Christmas, and what to do with his life. And like many people, he chooses poorly. There’s nothing wrong with pursuing money and power, except when it becomes valued more than people. Even more than the people that could be their best friends and supporters.

The problem is that Lex, like many of us, is scared. Scared that if he takes a risk to secure joy for himself, he’ll be disappointed. So he deludes himself into thinking he can prevent such pain, by providing himself with wealth and position, trusting it will also bring him love and joy.

It won’t.

Christmas is a time of hope, and hope isn’t for cowards. It’s believing for joy in the midst of pain. For provision in a time of poverty. For forgiveness from those you have hurt. For a second chance from those you have betrayed. Even a super-villain in the making can find a joyful life, if that’s what he really wants.

Because in the end, Christmas is a choice.

Just like peace.

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